Q: What’s a working bee’s motto? A: Work hard and stay bumble. Q: What grades did the students get on their honey project? A: Mostly Bees. Q: What do you call a bee on weight watchers? A: Chub-bee. Q: What did the businesswoman say? A: We are in bees-ness now. Q: When do bees get married? A: When they’ve found their honey. Q: What do you get if you cross a bee with a dog? A: A beegle. Q: What’s the one thing bees never forget to bring to the beach? A: Frisbees. Q: What’s a bee’s favorite flower? A: A bee-gonia. Q: What did the bee say to the flower? A: Hey bud. Q: What’s another name for a wasp? A: A wanna-bee. Q: What’s black and yellow and flies at 30,000 feet? A: A bee on an airplane. Q: What is a swarm of really small queen bees called? A: The royal wee. Q: The bees favorite guns? A: BeeBee guns, I suppose. Q: What happens when a bee burps near the queen? A: It gets a royal pardon. Q: What is the last thing to go through a bee’s mind when it hits a windshield? A: Its stinger. Q: What kind of bees drop things? A: Fumble bees! Q: Who’s a bee’s favorite singer? A: Bee-yoncé. Q: What’s a happy bumblebee’s blood type? A: Bee positive! Q: What did one bee say to the other when they landed on the same flower? A: Buzz off. Q: Why do bees get married? A: Because they found their honey! This article was originally published on TODAY.Q: What’s a bee’s favorite flower? A: Bee-gonias! Anita who? Anita tell you that I love you. Dough who? Dough you wish it was Valentine’s Day already? Kenya who? Kenya be my Valentine already. Daryl who? Daryl never be anyone like you. What did one sheep say to the other? Ewe complete me. What did the pasta say to the tomato? I love it when you get saucy. What did one scientist say to the other? We’ve got great chemistry. What did one puzzle piece say to the other? We fit together. What did the purse say to the handbag? I never want to leave your side. Why did the astronaut couple break up? They needed space. What did one light bulb say to the other? I love you watts and watts. What did one hotdog say to the other? You’re a real weiner! What did one recliner say to the other? I chair-ish you. What did one popsicle say to the other? You make me melt. What did the latte say to the espresso? We are meant to bean. What one cantaloupe say to the other? You’re one in a melon. What did one volcano say to the other? I lava you. What did one toad say to the other? Never frog-et how much I love you. What did one flea say to the other? You’re dyna-mite. What did one banana say to the other? You’ve got appeal. What did one lamp say to the other? You light up my life. What did one yardstick say to the other? We be-long together. What did the thread say to the needle? I’m sew into you. What did the acorn say to the tree? I’m fallin’ for you. How do astronomers propose on Valentine's Day? They planet. What’s a bread loaf’s favorite song? “All You Knead is Love.”ĭid you hear about the spider wedding? Yes, they’re newly-webs. What did one plate say to the other on Valentine’s Day? Tonight, dinner’s on me.ĭid you hear about the two radios that got married? The reception was amazing. What did one pig say to the other? Don’t go bacon my heart. Why does Cupid like lettuce? It’s got a heart. Why was the ghost sad on Valentine’s Day? He didn’t have a boo. What’s Cupid’s favorite candy? Hershey’s Kisses. What do astronauts say to their sweethearts? I love you to the moon and back. What kind of dinner does Cupid eat? A heart-y one. What's the best way to get a date for Valentine's Day? Look at a calendar. What did the magnet say to the fridge? I find you attractive.ĭid you hear about the love affair between the sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake. Then I remembered you knocked my socks off. Valentine's day jokes (TODAY / Getty Images)Īre you the internet? Because I'm feeling a connection. These so- bad-they’re-good jokes will keep you giggling, no matter how you celebrate the heart-shaped holiday - even if you're single and trying to avoid Valentine's Day at all costs.įind a favorite? Use one of these short jokes as a Valentine's Day Instagram captions, and we promise your followers will shower you with nothing but Xs and Os. Especially on Valentine's Day when you're hustling to buy flowers, filling out cards and hoping to score reservations at your favorite restaurant.Īnd when you discover that your bistro is booked, shrug it off with a few Valentine's Day jokes - then light some candles and order take-out instead.īecause while you might be out of luck with dinner, we're certain you're going to love this collection of Valentine's Day puns, one-liners and knock-knock jokes that are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone. That's because corny jokes, as groan-worthy as they may be, can be funny. Even if this dad joke made you cringe, you still chuckled at least a little bit. Want to know the best way to get a date for Valentine's Day? Just look at the calendar.Īdmit it.
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